The comments and critiques were great! I totally understand where you got the whole "discursiveness" feeling from my paper because honestly, I had to come up with a lot of "fillers" to meet the minimum of four pages with this paper. Some of these fillers are what you mentioned like the random sentence about Star Trek and when I started to bring in Gullah. I did this because I was trying to compare it with Eragon because both evolved from the languages they descended from.
What a talented teacher! Yes, I didn't do an outline...and I should have. It's just that I was going off my thesis and trying to fit in all my randomness so that I could complete the task at hand. I mean there is only so much one can say about the topic I chose. Especially when the Eragon sources were not very helpful. In my paper I was trying to point out the similarities in the languages and the author wasn't informative. He had random words in his languages but hardly any were the same word translated into multiple languages so it was really hard to compare them. I really had to research. And I thought it was going to be easy...little did I know.
My ending was supposed to be drawing the thesis back in. I also had student critiques that involved the "So what?" question and so I tried to address that. Someone commented that I should make the conclusion more final by expanding a little bit. I attempted to try to fit all of these components into the conclusion, so I guess it may have turned out to be a jumble of techniques of endings instead of one precise one. When I first heard of the accursed "Research Paper" I was super depressed, but I actually enjoyed my topic because I chose it and it interested me. Overall, it really wasn't too bad.
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